Tues 5th October : Painful Freedom

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I had it all prepared but I fluffed my lines. I knew I would. It was like leaving a girlfriend. I knew the order of the subjects I wanted to talk about but I went round in circles. I forced eye contact than dropped again. Ten months we had been together. Thick and very thin. Arguments and celebrations. Boredom and euphoria.

I hit the money subject first. American's understand the 'I'm in debt and my girlfriend needs half the mortgage'. Then I hit the 'I've been reviewing what the job role is since I got back' section. Then I lept for PSFK. 'Well I got noticed by my work on PSFK.' His eyes lit up. Then he smiled. 'I've been offered a great job.' He was happy for me. Was it not as bad as I dreaded? It was worse. I was leaving him. Leaving him with our tickets booked to LA for the meeting tomorrow. Leaving him with the workload. Leaving this ad agency we tried to found. Leaving him this moment. Leaving him now. No notice. Now.

Behind the smile he looked in shock.

We stood. We shook. I wished him luck and felt the pang. I suggested coffee next week and the smile returned a little.

I walked away feeling guilty. Feeling coniving.

But I was free.

And tomorrow really is another day.

Posted by Guy Brighton on October 5, 2004 at 06:21 PM | Tags/Topics: | | (1) | | Add GB To Your News Feed

« Tue 5th Oct : Still Waiting | Main | Wed 6th Oct : 1st Day »

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Comments

Good luck in LA mate, will this mean a move away from NYC?

Posted by: will at October 7, 2004 1:35 PM

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